Some Ripped Off Vocaloid Song Title
by NoName-chan
Summary: Allen's late to school, and as he hurriedly rushes into the building, he runs into Kanda and- Oh, screw it. Look, this is a parody making fun of really bad fanfictions, okay? ((Oneshot/Yullen/Contains Mary Sue for satiric purposes/OH SWEET MOTHER OF GOD CRACK GALORE))


"Uwah! I'm going to be late!" I put a piece of toast in my mouth and ran out the door. Hi, my name is Allen Walker, and I am late for shcool! Im a high scool student from china because my master abandoned me and hit me with a hammer so I came to the united states. I get to the schuul but as I get there I run into a hella sexy/chiseled chest. "ow you baka moyashi!" a deep voice basically buttfucks me. Uwah! It's Kanda Yuu, the most popular boy in skhool! He and me are worse enemies in the world because he always calls me insults in japanese even though he isnt from japan. Hes really fucking hotT though but WAIT nO! I'm noT GAYyY?¿? He glared at me and pulls out his Mugen. "Dye!" he screams but then a combat boot hits him in the face and he felled down. "You bakas! Stahp fighting UGH!" says Mary Sue, my best friend in the entire world. She is Kanda's sister and he is sOOoO protective of her but she's the only one who can take him down. She has long purple hair and bright silver eyes that turn red when shes angry and cat ears and a tail and she is the most beautiful girl in scheuwel. She is also the most talented girl and also the smartest and most athletic but nobody is jealous of her because she is very sweet and friends with everyone. She is also dating Lavi, the most sexy hottest boy in skxcoeul but he only loves her and he is her future husband and any fangirl that says otherwise is fUCKING DEAD YOU GOT ME? Mary Sue is my best friend eVER because when I was a kid my adoptive father was brutally murdered by the Noah mafia in front of me causing me to have PTSD and she comforted me. Lavi shows up and he and Mary Sue kiss and are like sOoO in love!¡ Suddenly, a person shouts "HEY ALLEN YOU'RE A fUCKInG TWaT¡!" and Kanda punches him in the fACE?¿? I look at Kanda with glittery Uke eyes and blush. "wha-aaaa?" I stutter, and Kanda picks me up bridal style. "Aren~" he says really fucking sexily "I have always loved you." "O-Oh, Yuu, I love you too!" I reply and Kanda takes me to the janitors closet and we have some rEALLY kinky buttsex!¡! Mary Sue listens to my extremely loud gay moaning on the other side of the door while Lavi sighs and sweatdrops. 10 years later, Yuu and me are married and Mary Sue and Lavi are married too and live next to us. I get pregnant somehow, and we named our beautiful son Kiroshi. We grow old together and find out that Mary Sue is actually immortal and stays beautiful forever.

 **THE END~!**

 **~oxOxo~**

 **A/N:**

 **NoName-chan: So... What up, guys? XD**

 **Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee: WHERE THE** ** _FUCK_** **HAVE YOU BEEN?!**

 **NoName-chan: *hits Allen, Kanda, and Lavi over the head with my shovel* stop fuckinG SCREAMinG! *stretches* Ah, it's been too long since I've brutally bashed someone's skull in~**

 **Allen: *rubs head* And you still only hit the people who aren't female. Shocker =.=**

 **Lenalee: *sips tea casually, completely ignoring Allen's claim of blatant sexism* So where HAVE you been, NoName-chan?**

 **NoName-chan: ... Around.**

 **Lavi: You were hiding from rabid fangirls, weren't you?**

 **NoName-chan:** ** _Yeah_** **. Well, that and a lot has been happening. I mean, I haven't been on FFN in over a YEAR! A lot changes in a person! BUT, I'll leave** ** _that_** **story for the excruciatingly long DGS Author Note to come. Yes, you heard me right, I AM going to continue DGS! I have no idea WHEN that will happen because as you've probably figured out already, I'm not exactly the kind of person who can meet deadlines, but it will happen! For now, rest assured that I still exist! ;D**

 **Lenalee and Fangirls: YAY!**

 **Allen, Kanda, Lavi: *GROAN***

 **NoName-chan: *grins and takes a bow* Thank you, thank you~! Well, anyway, it's been such a long time since I've written that I'm not even sure if my fanbase still exists, but if you do, please RxR and feel free to talk to me on PMs! I actually check that now! :D Oh, and I forgot to do the Disclaimer at the beginning, so, Kanda~?**

 **Kanda: Fuck off, you pancake chested twatwaffle.**

 **NoName-chan: *hits him with my shovel* DO IT, YOU MENSTRUATING PILE OF SHARK CUNT!**

 **Kanda: CHE! NoName-chan does not own DGM!**


End file.
